This has been the most mentally taxing month of teaching that I have experienced yet and surprisingly enough, it has almost nothing to do with what is going on in my classroom. If anything, I have been most struck this month by the insurmountable buildup of things that my students have going on in their lives outside of the classroom. I knew that my students had troubles at home last year but our crew this year is really facing some tough things and coupled with this has been some investigations going on at the school dealing with faculty members. I was telling my mom over break this week that I am so thankful that all of this madness did not happen last November because I'm not sure I would have made it.
Here's a short recap of my month:
1. Several students suspended for fighting
2. One student suspended and referred to tribunal for throwing a desk at a teacher
3. News crew showing up to the school based on allegations of a faculty member
4. One student inflicting harm on himself in my classroom out of anger
5. One student expressing her desire to move from her current living situation and melting down to me talking about it
6. Another student telling me about how her home is unsafe
...plus our normal day to day
I am absolutely not listing things out for a pity party. I have reflected on them and thought through them and talked through them. I am mentally tired but I am not broken. I am listing these things because this month, my biggest take away is that my students have SO MUCH going on outside of my classroom. We talk about this all the time. I dealt with it last year but I don't think that I fully wrapped my mind around it until recently. I actually still do not think that I have my mind wrapped around it. I have been struck by it again and again. I have been thinking a lot about the control that I have in my classroom to keep my students safe and help them feel loved and how that cannot always extend from within my four walls.
We have to teach our students to be advocates for themselves. They have to know that when they leave my classroom, I still love and care about them and will do anything to help them. They have to know that they have the right to be heard and to be safe. They have to know how to approach all of these things in a respectful manner. They have to be able to stand up for themselves. I can help them with those things within my four walls and teach them how to carry it outside of there.
November, you have been long and grueling but I am thankful for what I have learned about both my students and myself.
